Making Maki is the home of Maki B. It’s where all of life’s parts meet. Figuring out the work-life balance, managing finances, navigating relationships, finding the things that give us joy, appreciating life’s journey and caring for ourselves along the way. Making Maki isn’t about finding any particular thing; it’s about always searching for the best versions of ourselves and making the most of all life’s lessons and opportunities.
Once again, another holiday that I didn’t have on my calendar. How are there so many of these ‘supposed’ holidays? Where are they coming from? I need answers.
Seeing that I didn’t have Father’s Day on my horizon, the day was going to get a hard pass. Then I remembered that I’d given some attention to Mother’s Day, so it was only fair that I do the same for Father’s Day. In weighing the option of skipping over Father’s Day all together, I realized that skipping over Father’s Day has been the norm for as long as I can remember. In kindergarten and elementary school, we made Mother’s Day cards like our lives depended on it. Meanwhile Father’s Day was treated as an afterthought. As I’ve aged a bit since fourth grade and now have some father’s around me, I see the dangers of skipping over Father’s Day.
I know I may be opening my life up to an angry mob when I say this, but good fathers should be celebrated just as good mothers are. While I am well aware that women physically carry the babies and build bonds during pregnancy, men who are active parents are just as valuable. The active role that my father played in my life has contributed to the person I am today. I am who I am because of both my mother and my father. When I look in the mirror, I don’t see their physical inputs, I also see their character inputs. My father’s even temper is the main reason I rarely argue and never shout. His patience seems to be eluding me, but I’m still working on that. Thanking the universe for him and his inputs does not take away from the inputs of my mother and I think that’s something we can all try to remember.
It’s super cliché, but one light doesn’t dim when igniting another. Very recently I had someone remind me of the importance of treating things equally. If two things or people are to be treated equally, they should be respected, celebrated and criticized the same. They should be held to the same standard. If we choose to celebrate the sacrifices and contributions of wonderful mothers, we should be elated to celebrate amazing fathers. Celebrating a man’s achievements as a parent does not diminish the contributions of the mother, instead it shows our abilities to celebrate any person who puts good into the world. Let’s celebrate by showing appreciation for those who have contributed to our lives and our communities, including fathers. Also, aside from celebrating the good fathers, maybe there will be a spin-off. Maybe, just maybe, in acknowledging our great fathers we’ll be also encouraging other fathers to be the best they can be in their roles. Maybe we’ll be telling them that we see them and we will continue to see them. Perhaps our celebrations today will serve as reminders that we see the importance of strong active fathers and that we don’t take them for granted.
Thus, to the fathers and father figures out there, I see you. To those fathers who are kicking stereotypes out the window to be active participants in the lives of their children, to those who are as nurturing as they are protective, and to those who tell us that it’s okay to cry while reminding us of our strengths, thank you. To the fathers who have never received a second-grade artistic masterpiece, Happy Father’s Day.
P.S. Before closing out, I’d like to mention that South Korea no longer has separate Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, instead they have Parents’ Day. Parents’ Day is a fixed holiday and is observed on May 8th of each year. It is a fixed date (see how helpful that could be) to celebrate the contributions of parents. There is no separation, there is just equal appreciation and I’m here for it.