Dear Queenie,

I’m getting ready to go to college and I want to take courses that will prepare me for a career that I have always wanted to follow. My girlfriend and I plan to get married and start a family when I graduate, but the problem is that the career I want will involve a lot of travel so I will be away a lot of the time and I know family should come first.

Queenie, should I give up my career for my family or do you think we can make it work with my being away so much?—Planning my future

Dear Planning,

There are many couples who are happily married under the kind of circumstances you anticipate. It takes a lot of effort, but they make it work. And you may find your ambitions changing as you grow older, or you may find jobs within your chosen career path that require less travel than you anticipate, especially in these days of easy long-distance communication.

Dear Queenie,

After a family get-together with our children and grandchildren we noticed that some money was missing from my husband’s wallet that was sitting on the dresser in our bedroom.

No one was paying any attention, so anyone could have gone in there and taken the money.

Queenie, should we mention this to anyone or just let it go?—Ripped off

Dear Ripped,

Unless you want this to become an issue with your family every time you see any of them, let it go. But from now on make sure to lock up your money and any other valuables that could easily be taken. Lock the rooms they are in, if necessary. And if anyone asks about the security measures you have taken, tell them all why, without accusing anyone in particular. The culprits will (hopefully) get the message.

Dear Queenie,

My best friend doesn’t want me to date her brother because she says if we have any problems she would be caught in the middle, so her brother and I have been hanging out together without letting her know about it.

Queenie, I hate keeping a secret from my friend, but I know she’ll be mad at me if she ever finds out about it. What should I do?—Secret girlfriend

Dear Girlfriend,

Your best friend’s reason for not wanting you to date her brother is more than a little bit selfish. The only ones who have a right to try to keep you and her brother apart are his parents and yours, and if they do not object, stop sneaking around and let your friend know what is going on.

   And if you and her brother ever have any problems, keep her out of it.

Dear Queenie,

I’m a senior citizen who recently joined a senior citizens group for the social contact, but all they seem to do is complain about the weather, their health, the food, you name it they don’t like it, and it’s depressing.

So now I’m the one who is complaining – about them!

Any suggestions, Queenie?—Gloomy Gussie

Dear Gussie,

Find another group to hang out with, one with a purpose in life such as a volunteer organisation. There is nothing like being able to help others to improve one’s own outlook on life.

Dear Queenie,
My wife and her grown-up daughter from a previous marriage are joined at the hip via telephone. The daughter calls several times a day and they talk and talk about nothing in particular. She even has called when we were on vacation and in the middle of some special vacation activity.
She always calls on my wife’s cell phone, and my wife walks with it in her hand everywhere, even around the house, so she won’t miss a call. Our other children don’t do this.
Queenie, help!—Fed up husband

Dear Fed up,
This is not uncommon between mothers and daughters who are close. As long as your stepdaughter does not call while she is driving a vehicle and your wife does not answer such a call while she is driving, and as long as you do not have to answer the phone, do not make a big thing of this. After all, things would be much worse for your wife if she and her daughter were estranged.

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