Dear Queenie,
I’ve been going with this girl since we were in high school and I gave her an engagement ring last year. Her parents like me and my parents like her and they all get upset if we have an argument.
The problem is, I don’t think I am ready to get married and I’m not sure any more that she is the one I want to marry when I am ready. I have never dated anyone but her, so how can I tell if maybe there could be someone else I would like better? But how do I break it off with her without starting a big war?
Queenie, I wish she would break up with me and be done with it, but how do I get her to do it? And how do I get my ring back? I paid a lot of money for it—Changed my mind
Dear Changed my mind,
You tell your fiancée the truth and hope she takes it well. Then you – hopefully both of you – tell your families you have called off the wedding, and why.
You don’t get the ring back unless your fiancée is feeling very generous. It isn’t your ring, it’s hers. It was a gift you gave her to mark your engagement, and she has kept her side of the bargain. By the same token, you are not required to return any gifts she has given you.
