Dear Queenie,
A friend of mine has a gambling problem and his marriage is in trouble, so he is trying to get help for it with Gamblers Anonymous.
I’ve known about it for a long time because I was with him a couple of times at a casino and saw him losing a lot more than he could afford and now I feel guilty that I never said anything.
Queenie, should I have said something? And if I did, would it have made any difference?—Silent friend
Dear Friend,
You could have talked to your friend about this, but the question is: would he have paid any attention to what you said? People with that kind of problem often do not even admit to it, let alone try to do anything about it, until circumstances force them to do so.
Feeling guilty about your silence will not help him; neither would any apologies you could give him. The best thing you can do now is try to support his efforts to overcome this addiction and when you are with him make sure he is not betting on anything; for example, at sporting events or buying Lotto tickets. But mostly it is up to him.
