Dear Queenie,
My husband has a son in kindergarten from his previous marriage who lives with his mother (my husband’s ex-wife). I have never talked badly to the child about his mother or expected him to call me “Mom” or anything like that, but it’s obvious from the way he talks to me that his mother says bad things about me and blames me for their break-up and divorce.
What’s worse is that now my husband and I are expecting a baby and the boy is convinced that his father won’t love him anymore when the new baby comes.
Queenie, how do we handle all this?—Worried stepmother
Dear Stepmother,
Whenever the boy is with you and your husband, let him know how much you both love him, and will love him more than ever when the new baby comes and needs a big brother who loves him (or her) too.
As your stepson gets older he will learn to understand his mother’s bitterness, and you will be able to help him cope with it.
