“Let me take you to a place nice and quiet
There ain't no one there to interrupt
Ain't gotta rush
I just wanna take it nice and slow”
Get it? Let me take you to a place nice and quiet, because we’re on lockdown!
Hey, all you cool cats and kittens! (Why is Ashlee even like this? LOL!)
Man, why do I feel like I haven’t seen the sun in 269,483 days? Why do I feel like I was kidnapped and am being used as an extra in a Purge movie? Is this what prison feels like? I mean seriously, I have all the food I need, internet, books, equipment to do light workouts, and all I see every day are the same walls of my apartment. This must be what prison is like. Minus the risk of getting manhandled by a buff dude named Willis.
*Spits out water in laughter!*
It’s my first day back after 16 months of lockdown and I’m still getting fire on these.... Readers. Kevin Hart? Get it? No?
I’ve been handling the lockdown pretty well, though. On a more serious note, I had made a schedule really early on, so I try to hit my points on the to-do-list daily. Sometimes, I just can’t be bothered and spend all day in boxers, laid up in front my iMac eating cashews. YES, I’m still eating healthy! Ain’t nobody trying to come out of this lockdown with a potbelly!
Why am I coming across a little aggressive? That’s a lot of exclamation marks. Is this what the side effects of solitary confinement feel like?
To all my gym rats and CrossFitters, how are you guys doing? Julie, Claire, King James, Sjamira, Anchia, Shama, y’all alive? You guys better be working on that pancake! LOL! Especially you, Julie.
As you can imagine, I have nothing really serious to talk about. I could talk about all the complaining that’s going-on on Facebook, or all the complaining about the complaining, or that Indian lady that put Trump on blast in the news, but none of that is as entertaining as hearing about my life in solitude, right?
That had to have been some kind of run on sentence. Mrs. Hart would be disappointed, or Mrs. Van Putten!!
Honestly, the three things I miss the most are the movies, weightlifting and my baby Danielle. Of course, those are not in any particular order. I miss walking up to the concession stand like “Yo, Jen-naaay! Run me two hotdogs and a coke, please.” And how can I forget: “How you mean you guys don’t have relish??” Good times. I miss the feeling of catching a 275lb barbell in a clean and then *POW* push jerk “tha heck”. And I miss playing in Danielle’s hair while she’s hugging me. The Lady Bug to my Lightning Bolt.
Oh! Guys, wash ayu hands please! Practice social distancing! If you don’t need to be on the road, stay off the road! Even though we “only” have north of 50 positive cases, our positive to tested ratio is so much higher than a lot of other places. We need to do our part to flatten the curve.
We may have been late on all the precautionary measures and what not, but now that we’re attacking this thing head on, the population needs to do their part. Stop play the rear!
Stay safe!
*Yo, Siri, play Nice And Slow by Usher*
