Dear Queenie,
My son had a child with his girlfriend in high school. That was almost 10 years ago. The girl he is with now came to me and asked if he had ever had any children and I couldn’t lie to her. I didn’t give her any details about the child, but I did admit that there was one.
Now my son is mad at me for not keeping his secret and says he will never speak to me again.
Queenie, how can I make up with him for giving away his secret?—Unhappy mother
Dear Mother,
For one thing, this is a small island and I doubt your son’s child is much of a secret – what makes him think the child’s mother has not told everyone she knows who the father is? For another thing, his current girlfriend must have had some idea about this child or she would not have come to you for confirmation. For a third thing, what right does your son have to expect you to lie for him?
Your son owes you an apology for expecting you to lie for him and to back up any lies he has told, and for getting angry with you for being too honest to do so. He should be trying to make up with you, not the other way around.
