Dear Queenie,
My wife was formerly married to a man who abused her and now if I move suddenly or reach out to touch her she ducks as if she thinks I am going to hit her.
Queenie, I would never do anything like that and she knows it but she still seems to have this reflex. Is there anything we can do to get her over it?—Worried husband
Dear Husband,
As you said, this is a reflex born from your wife’s previous abusive relationship. It is a form of PTSD and she may need professional counselling to get over it. Talk it over with her – gently, quietly – and see if you can persuade her to try to get such counselling. Your family doctor may be able to recommend someone who can help her.
