Dear Queenie,

I work at night, so I pick up my kids at school in the afternoon while my wife is still at work at her daytime job. There is a woman I met while we were waiting to pick up our kids and she suggested that we get together some time for coffee.

I’m thinking of going out with her, because I really, really like her and my marriage isn’t all that great these days.

Queenie, should I?—Undecided

Dear Undecided,

What you should do is make sure this woman knows you are married, not single or divorced, and see whether her offer is still open. If it is, you will know she is the kind of woman who does not mind interfering in someone else’s marriage, which may (I hope) change the way you feel about her.

Either way, you should turn down her offer and work with your wife on whatever is wrong in your marriage.

Dear Queenie,
On New Year’s Eve at a party a couple I am friends with asked me if I would like to get together with them some time for what they called “a threesome.” I’m a normal; man and she’s a good-looking woman and I would love to “get together” with her any time, but not with her husband staring at us, and certainly not with him!
Queenie, I said “No, thanks,” but what must they think of me?—Perplexed

Dear Perplexed,
Maybe the wife finds you attractive and her husband was willing to indulge her if he was present to watch. Or perhaps the husband is bisexual and was hoping you were gay and his wife was willing to indulge him if she was present to watch.
Or possibly they were drunk and not thinking at all.
Whatever opportunity they were offering you, you were very wise not to take them up on the offer.

Dear Queenie,

My sister is a world-class snoop. Every time she visits us, if we don’t keep a close eye on her she will go through our things – not just like medicine cabinet and kitchen cupboards, but closets, desk and bureau drawers, night table, even the pockets of clothes she finds lying around. Then she gossips about whatever she finds to whoever will listen.

We found out about it when someone she gossiped to mentioned something to us and when we asked how they knew about it they said she told them.

Queenie, is there any way to put a stop to this?—Offended sibling

Dear Sibling,

Well, you could put locks on all your drawers, closets, cupboards, etc.

Or you could make up a lot of little notes saying, “Hey, Sis, mind your own f***ing business” and put them everywhere you think she might stick her nose into – but probably not if you want her to ever speak to you again.

Or you could make sure that whenever Sis is in your house you or your spouse is right there next to her keeping an eye on her, although that might be awkward when Sis goes to the bathroom.

Or you could have a heart-to-heart conversation with her about how offended you are by her snooping, for whatever good it might do.

The only other thing I can think of is to bar her from your house completely – and, if necessary, explain to any other members of your family your reason for doing so.

Dear Queenie,
When my girlfriend and I were together we promised each other we would still be friends if we ever broke up, but after we did break up a few months ago she doesn’t want anything to do with me. She doesn’t answer my calls and when I sent her an e-mail she replied, “Please leave me alone.”
Queenie, what happened to still being friends?—Totally rejected

Dear Rejected,
I may depend on the reason for your breakup.
If it was because the two of you had drifted apart, she may still be trying to get over the pain of the breakup.
On the other hand, if you broke up in anger over something one of you had done, she may still be angry at you.
Either way, have the courtesy to respect her wishes.