Dear Editor,
Death is as present as the shadows cast from our bodies by the sun’s brilliance during our waking life. Intertwined with life is this non-negotiator ever lurking in the shadows, remaining unseen from an espial right in the here-and-now. Death comes knocking at our doors unannounced, oblivious to whether we are prepared or not. What an inflexible and cruel truth this can be for those who are overwhelmed by the co-existence of this invisible resident.
From the moment we fall into time, we are stamped with an expiration date unknown to even the most celebrated doomsday prophets in our midst. The advent of science has been able to pronounce approximately so on the expected time of our arrival, when we are likely to come into physical existence. But thus far it has not been equally successful in notifying us generally of the moment of our departure, when we will cease to be.
Dying is a certainty that awaits us all. None of us can escape or get out of this eventuality. Nevertheless, death and the time of its occurrence, which remains largely unknown to us, need not terrify us if we embrace it as an integral part of life. We cannot have one without the other, which is not bad after all, as our very lives revolve around “give” and “take”. If we choose to compare the inevitability of death with the prospects of us living eternally, being sentenced to eternity by an unforgiving Maker without the possibility of parole, we may be invited to entertain perspectives that can help us to cope with our mortality.
The thought of having to live forever, to go on involuntarily without the possibility of dying, can worry us as equally as the fact of our death. The awareness of having to endure everlastingly all and sundry – “for the mind to perpetually suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortunes” – unable to voluntarily induce “sleep” upon itself as it desires can be haunting. And for the body to decay irreversibly without any likelihood of disconnecting itself from life is evenly affecting. In this state we become miserably married to eternity, powerless to relieve ourselves from pain when we would have crossed the threshold of tolerance. Not even euthanasia can help. Death becomes impossible, rendering us incapable of dying. Denying our mortality, our transition from life to death is analogous to opposing the fact of our birth and it doesn’t help.
The sooner we can muster the courage to confront the fear and anguish which we have for the moment when we will cease to be a part of life, the sooner we will be able to emerge from our stupor and act on this awareness, hurriedly commence living like we have never lived before. Knowing we can become permanently separated this very moment from our families, friends, pets, and the things that are dear to us can make us become more vigilant and alert, hastening us to squeeze and chisel as much as we humanly can out of this very moment, fully aware that this moment is really and truly all we have.
The fear of death is largely an irrational one. This unfounded fear for our dissolution, our biological failure, for the end of our earthly vacations isn’t usually confronted with the fearlessness it requires for us to become liberated from the anxiety it inflicts upon us. Faced with the thought of the cessation of our lives we often choose “flight” instead of “fight”, constantly and consciously avoiding discussions, conversations and even our own internal monologues which remind us of our impermanence. We are forever pushing the consciousness of our mortality into the background of our lives, missing windows of opportunities if taken can humble us into accepting the certainty of our collective fate which is destined for all of us regardless of our earthly deeds and possessions.
Death is an equalizer which is indifferent to all of us. We cannot evade it even with our best efforts, knowledge and capabilities. We can deceive ourselves and we often do into believing that it is postpone-able, us capable of regulating and delaying its oncoming, not desiring it until sometime in the distant future or, worst yet, not welcoming it at all. And this delusion of our purported control over its timing and arrival is endured and supported by the distractions of our daily lives. Our minds are constantly occupied with the vicissitudes of our daily routines, with our incessant need for keeping up appearances, perennially forming and dismantling identities. Our mental space becomes so crowded with our superficial selves that it knocks the awareness of the certainty of our demise out of our consciousness.
Quite a few inmates that are on death row in the US awaiting their final moment of restitution for their actions have successfully attended and passed “Death 101”: a self-imposed period of self-reflection, self-analysis and a general reflection on life in the face of death. Those that came out of this period accepted their impending fate and gained a new lease on life, deriving joy, happiness, and freedom from even the most mundane and overlooked things in our daily lives. This in a way is indicative of the capacity of the human mind – criminal or not – to transcend its conditioning, to rise above the limitations imposed upon it and to find peace and calm even in the face of the circumstances that frightens us the most.
The Sun does Shine is the memoir of Ray Hinton, a former death row inmate who spent over 30 years in prison awaiting his execution for a crime he was wrongly accused of and convicted for. Reading the story of this remarkable storyteller who was eventually released from prison provides a glimpse into a mind that remained hopeful and at the same time came to terms with its own mortality.
For those among us who have been able to accept and face the reality of their own death, more power to you and continue to enjoy “heaven and hell” right here on earth in the midst of death. Conversely, there are a lot of coping mechanisms and strategies for those that are struggling to mentally surmount obstacles which are delaying their liberation from the fear of death. Help is abundantly available to alleviate the dread, anxiety and depression that often accompanies the thought of dying.
Orlando Patterson
