Dear Queenie,
My father has a habit of making critical comments when we talk. Sometimes he gets just plain nasty. It gets so bad I just don’t want to talk to him at all, but he is my father and my only living parent – my mother died several years ago – and I don’t want to just cut him out of my life.
Queenie, how can I get him to be less unpleasant?—Offended son
Dear Son,
Have you tried telling your father – as calmly and gently as you can manage – that when he says things like that it hurts your feelings? And if he continues, end the conversation.
You may have to go through this routine several – even many – times, but unless he is suffering from some form of dementia, he should get the message eventually.
If he does not, you may have to limit the amount of time you spend talking to him.
