Dear Queenie,
My wife and I went out with a couple we have known for years. I don’t drink, but they all do. They had a lot to drink at dinner and afterward we went home and they all drank a lot more.
My wife went to bed after a while and the other fellow’s wife fell asleep on our sofa, I guess “passed out” would be a better word for it. I didn’t want to tell the other guy to take his wife and go home because he was pretty drunk and I didn’t think it was safe for him to drive.
After a while I thought he had fallen asleep, so I went to bed too. Around daylight I woke up and there he was sitting on the other side of the bed next to my wife, putting on his pants! I didn’t know what to do so I pretended to be asleep and he went and got his wife up and pretty soon I heard them leaving.
When my wife got up she claimed she couldn’t remember anything after she went to bed. I don’t know what to think, but I’m so mad I’m ready to get a divorce.
Queenie, what do you think of all this?—Sober husband
Dear Sober husband,
I think your wife and your friends have a drinking problem and should consider joining Alcoholics Anonymous (AA).
I also think it’s possible your friend was so drunk he didn’t know where he was when he came into your bedroom, that he was too drunk to do anything but pass out, and that when he sobered up enough to realise his mistake he tried to sneak out before you woke up.
Ask him what happened. You may be able to tell from his reaction what, if anything, happened. And if he claims he can’t remember, which may very well be true, it will give you an opening to suggest that he and his wife need help for their drinking problem.
Under the circumstances, you already have good reason to make the same suggestion to your wife.
