Dear Queenie,
My sister is married to a nasty abusive man who treats her horribly. We, her family, put up with him for her sake but we really don’t like him.
I found out recently that my sister is having an affair with a very nice man who treats her the way she deserves. I am glad she has found someone to make her happy but I do not approve of her cheating on her husband even if he deserves it. The others in our family who know about her affair feel the same way.
We all think she should leave her husband before he does something really awful to her, get a divorce and be free to get together with this other man.
Queenie, should we talk to her about this?—Worried sibling
Dear Sibling,
If you talk to your sister, it should be only about resolving the problems in her marriage, perhaps – especially! – by getting professional counselling and legal advice. The rest of it, much as it troubles you, is really none of your business.
