Dear Queenie,
I have fallen in love with a man who is one of my best friends, but recently he told me that he is gay and that another man who I thought was his brother is really his lover.
I haven’t told my friend how I feel about him and I don’t want to lose him as a friend, but it hurts me to see him with this other man.
Queenie, is there anything I can do about all this?—Feeling left out
Dear Feeling left out,
How would you feel if your friend had told you he was in love with another woman? The situation here is similar, except for the fact that even if your friend were to break up with his male lover, he would not be interested in you as a replacement. You will have to look elsewhere for a romantic partner.
Meanwhile, if you cannot bear to see these two lovebirds together, or even to see your friend alone without wishing he were available to you as a lover, explain your situation to him and tell him that is why you are not going to be seeing him for a while, until you can resolve these feelings.
