Dear Queenie,
My mother died years ago and my father’s neighbors never so much as paid their condolences, let alone invite him over for coffee or even just to chat.
Now the neighbour woman’s husband has died and all of a sudden she has been spending a lot of time with my father. He takes her to run errands and she cooks dinner for him and things like that.
Queenie, would it be rude of me to ask her what’s going on here?—Worried daughter

Dear Daughter,
Yes, it would be rude to ask, but I think the answer to your question is obvious: two bereaved, lonely people are finding comfort in each other’s company. And, yes, this may become more than simple friendship, but your father is an adult and does not need you to look out for him.
As for their not having been friends while her husband was still alive, maybe her husband was the jealous type, regarded your widowed, single father as competition and did not want anything to do with him.

Dear Queenie,
My husband’s father always remembers both our birthdays with cards and cash, but he always gives my husband more money than he gives me.
Queenie, I don’t get it (literally). Do you?—Short-changed daughter-in-law

Dear Daughter-in-law,
I can think of several possible reasons: His son is a blood relative, you are not. He has known his son longer than he has known you. His son is a man, you are a woman. If his son is considerably older than you are, the age difference may be the reason. He thinks of his son as the head of the household, supporting you, and therefore needing the money more. Etc., etc., etc.
If you really want to know, try asking him – as sweetly and non-confrontationally as you can manage.

Dear Queenie,
I am 22, a college graduate, and living with my boyfriend who is just out of high school and has no plans to go to college. I have a good job but he does not have any job at all, so he does not pay child support for our baby.
There are a couple of jobs he could get for minimum wages but he says he wants something better and won’t even apply for them. He says he wants to support us, but all he does is sleep and go out drinking with his friends, so I am supporting all of us.
Queenie, how can I get him to settle down and get a job, even if the pay is low?—In love with him

Dear In love,
Why should your boyfriend grow up and take on any responsibility when Mommy (you) is willing to support him and let him do as he pleases? The answer is, he will not, as long as you continue to coddle him.
You are doing him no favour by letting him take advantage of you this way. Kick him out and sue him for child support. He will be better off in the long run if he is forced to grow up and face up to his adult responsibilities – and so will you and your baby.
And by the way, where are his parents, your baby’s grandparents, in all of this? Did they throw him out for being so irresponsible? Is that why he is living with and mooching off of you?

Dear Queenie,
I hate to visit my best friend at her house. It’s always dirty and smelly because they don’t clean up after their pets, her father is always shouting at someone about something and her brother and sisters are mean to her and to me.
Queenie, I want to hang out with her, but I’d rather do it at my house. How can I stay away from her house without insulting her?—Disgusted friend

Dear Friend,
Always invite your friend to your house. When she invites you to her house, tell her you would be more comfortable in your own home. If she spends enough time there with you, she may understand why you prefer it without having to have it spelled out for her.